*please forgive typos. I'm using Safari on an iPad mini. Half this post was typed without me actually seeing it.*
I just...wow. I'm still having spasmatic giggles about this particular event. It's too long to post as a Facebook status but should definitely make for an interesting blog post.
To begin, a small backstory. Right before Jack was potty trained, we bought a bad box of diapers from Target. They scratched and tore his poor hips up where the outer and inner pieces come together. Nina is in cloth diapers about 85% of the time due to her massive thighs and explosive poops. More or less depending on where I am in laundry and whether we remembered to pick up disposables and whether we are traveling. Usually, when we're good, she wears a disposable at night and we usually buy Luvs. We almost exclusively buy Luvs from BJs and we get a box every other month or so.
Tonight, when we went to put on her bedtime diaper, we noticed she was gouging at her poor bum cheek. Knowing the protocol from having been through the disastrous diaper event of 2012(13, maybe? Who cares?) with Jack, I knew that not having the receipt meant that we would get a handful of $8 coupons instead of my money back. I know Target can look up my receipt with my debit card, so I opted to just take the box back and complain to them. So I did. I trudged through 5 inches of snow, thanked god again for owning the only van that currently has AWD and meandered my way to Target.
When I arrived the lot was practically empty. It was after 9:15, so they were only open for another 45 minutes. I pulled in and parked like a jackass, but that's not my fault exactly, as you can't see the lines what with all the snow. I parked between a dark blue Sienna and the cart corral. Walked in, did my stuff, paid, and walked out. Walked over to the cart corral, unlocked my car, and threw my stuff in, avoided hitting the door of the dark blue van next to me. I realized I turned off my interior lights from earlier after I used them to blast the defroster while I cleaned the snow off the van.
As I got in the van....something felt...not quite right. The seat was too close to the wheel and sat too upright. The radio was silent. I looked around and noticed there was a pair of glasses hanging from the rear view mirror. Now, I know what you're probably thinking, that I should have figured out that the car wasn't mine when I noticed the glasses. Not so much. No, I had to go to the scary, I've-watched-too-many-shows-like-Criminal-Minds place and immediately my first thought was that there was SOMEONE in the car and they were going to kill me. Duh.
Panic set in. I started hyperventilating. I looked around and realized...
The car was spotless. There were no cups chilling in the cup holders. No daycare notes or crafts cluttering the center console. And most importantly, NO CAR SEATS. I stopped. I calmed down. I laughed. And I got the hell out of that other, much cleaner, lady's car. I nonchalantly grabbed my crap and casually walked across the lot to my lonely van, sitting next to the OTHER cart corral. My blue neighbor had left. I got into my own, messier, more comfortable van and laughed my ass off.
OH BUT WAIT. It gets better. There were witnesses to this entire event! A couple walked out of the store in front of me. They parked across from the other van. The van that wasn't mine. I can only imagine what they were thinking.
Seriously, though. Who doesn't lock their doors at night, in a massive parking lot, practically in the middle of nowhere?
I'm still laughing. Can't believe I did that moment documented for life. It was too good not to share!
I watch how much you love your sister. She's still small, and you're always reminding us of things she's not supposed to have, but she's becoming your playmate. She frustrates you sometimes. She takes your toys, or knocks your Skylanders off the portal while you're playing games, but you're always quick to forgive. That's good, you'll need that ability when she's older and you're fighting over who gets to drive the hovercar first. 
